Odd Couples

Walter Mathau and Jack Lemon. Tony Randall and Jack Klugman. Roger Rabbit and Jessica Rabbit. Angelina Jolie and Billy Bob Thornton. There have been all kinds of odd couples throughout history. The fictional odd couples have made me laugh many times. The real life couples are the ones that make go “hmmm,” “Okaaaay,” “What the…?” and sometimes even “How much did he pay her?! ” (That last one comes to mind every time I think of Angelina and Billy Bob.)

There are certain people that should never be together. The movie and TV show “The Odd Couple” have shown what happens when two men who should never be together end up stuck in the same apartment. The Oscar and Felix situations were so fabulously funny but cannot compare to the crazy couples in real life. You know the ones I’m talking about. It is time to try to understand the odd ways of love and then once we are all done we can sit back together and, with a satisfaction of knowing we have analyzed it in painstaking detail, admit that we have no clue what’s going on there.

Let’s face it. Who Framed Roger Rabbit’s odd couple of Roger and Jessica makes more sense than Angelina Jolie and Billy Bob Thornton. There are some things that are just wrong. Let’s forget about the tattoos and vials of blood around their necks. The age difference doesn’t matter at all. But the basic thing is – and here I do admit to being a bit biased – have you looked at them. Angelina, personality quirks aside, has her picture in the dictionary beside the word “hot.” The same book has Billy Bob’s photo next to “dork,” “ugly,” and “unAngelina.” Love really makes no sense.

Courtney Cox and David Arquette are another example. Remembering back when they got married my only thought was, “WHY?!!” You will not be surprised to find out that a very wise and insightful interviewer whose name I can’t remember if I ever even knew asked that very same question the same way I would have asked it. Her reply was simple and honest. “He makes me laugh.” I thought to myself, “He’d better. That’s all he has going for him.” They were a very odd couple. The odder thing was the rumors about him cheating on her being the reason for the divorce. Two questions: What was he thinking? and who was the other woman? She must have been something to beat out Courtney.

The Vince Vaughn and Jennifer Aniston situation makes me think that sense of humor must have something to do with it. Granted I am a guy and am not a great judge of what looks good in other guys. If they are really handsome I can tell. But Vince? Am I missing something there? Jennifer Aniston is a babe and Vince is … ummm … not. The whole sense of humor thing may play a part but, to be fair, he’s not really that funny.

Maybe I’m just confused. Perhaps I’m bitter over lost loves. It could be that I’m right but that seems farfetched. I think we must all agree that love is deaf, dumb, and blind with no sense of smell, taste, touch or anything else that can measured.