Mongeese and Coffee

There are few things in life that compare to the fragrance of coffee wafting from the kitchen on an icy, cold morning. There is just something about the smell of freshly brewed coffee that can light the fires within us and make even the dreariest morning something that can be faced with courage and determination. Yeah, I don’t buy it either but it was worth a shot. I am NOT a morning person. To be fair, I’m not really that thrilled about afternoons either. But that time between 7:14pm and 7:38pm, I rock!

There are some things that make mornings a little less like root canal with no Novocain and coffee is one of them. Tea is the other. But for the purposed of this blog we will pretend like tea doesn’t exist no matter what all my English friends claim. Earl Grey may not be happy with me for this one but he will get over it.

The idea that coffee is more than a hot, dark brew that contains caffeine to get you going is a myth created the marketers from the highlands of Colombia, Brazil, Hawaii and the secret coffee growing community in the outskirts of Hazard, Kentucky. It may not be coffee in Hazard. I get coffee and moonshine mixed up all the time which may be why my morning drink does not help me wake up some days.

Anyway, I am of the opinion that coffee is coffee and all the hype centered on the special roasts and gourmet brews is nothing more than an excuse to charge $160 for a pound of coffee beans. That coffee is called Luwak coffee and has an unusual means of production. Those coffee beans are not even roasted until they have – I promise I am not making this up – passed through the digestive system of a mongoose. As strange as my thought process may be, even I would never, ever think to dig through mongoose poop looking for coffee beans. Are you wondering what I’m wondering? WHO THOUGHT OF THIS? And why would you think that pooped out coffee beans would be something that would make a nice tasting steaming cup of coffee. The steaming part would get to me. Also, who in their right mind would pay that much for poopy coffee? They have more dollars than common cents. On top of that, does that kind of coffee have the same alluring aroma as the cheaper, unpooped versions I can buy at the grocery store for $7.96 a pound?

There is part of me that would be tempted to try a cup of the mongoose pooped coffee. Fortunately, that part of me has been beaten into submission by another part of me that draws the line at recycling with plastic, cans, cardboard, glass, and Star Wars action figures.